Archive | February, 2014

Get What You Need

16 Feb

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Chuck loved Valentine’s Day. He would draw me a little cartoon in the morning before going to work. When he came home, he would bring flowers and a card. For a few years after the stroke, I keenly felt the loss of this silly holiday. Everyone (at least on Facebook) was getting flowers or candy or making plans for dinner. My sweetheart, once so thoughtful, doesn’t even realize it’s Valentine’s Day; and if he did, he would be unable to get me a gift. For a long time, I felt sorry for myself on V-Day, but then on one February 14th, I decided to feel gratitude and was moved to share on Facebook:

“I was tempted to feel sorry for myself today, but then I remembered all the times Chuck brought me flowers when it wasn’t even St. Valentine’s Day. I’m lucky that I found someone who genuinely caring, thoughtful, generous, and so many other wonderful things. He still is, even if he can’t express it in the tradition ways. I’d rather have him here, as is, than all the flowers, candy, and ‘Be Mine’ cards in the world. Plus, he’s given me the biggest gift of all: a way to express MY love in a way most people aren’t called upon to do, by taking care of him.”

Forty-eight people “liked” the post and 15 people commented.

“Laura, this is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen all day!!! What a fabulous valentine for your husband!!! What a beautiful spirit you have!”

“I don’t know your story, but I’ve never heard a sweeter Valentine!”

I was so touched. Each time I got another replay, I felt I had received a little Valentine.

In the words of the Rolling Stones, “You don’t always get what you want…but if you try sometimes…you get what you need.”

If you would like to learn more, please read my book, Stroke Happens.

Best, Laura Ann Garren

 

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